You Know You Have Had Too Much Coffee When…

You Know You Have Had Too Much Coffee When…

• You have to watch videos in fast-forward
• You lick your coffee pot clean
• Your eyes stay open when you sneeze
• You want to be cremated just so you can spend eternity in a coffee can
• You name your cats “Cream” and “Sugar”
• Your lips are permanently stuck in the sipping position
• Your first-aid kit contains two pints of coffee with an I.V. hookup
• You can type sixty words a minute with your feet
• Your only sources of nutrition comes from “Sweet & Low”
• You don’t sweat, you percolate
• You’ve worn out the handle on your favorite coffee mug
• You're offended when people use the word "brew" to mean beer
• The dishes in your house are all coffee cups
• A cup of coffee before bed doesn’t keep you from falling asleep anymore
• You believe that the coffee bean is a vegetable
• You think CPR stands for "Coffee Provides Resuscitation"
• You introduce your spouse as your coffeemate
• All your kids are named "Joe"
• Starbuck’s owns the mortgage on your house